worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
