I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Randomize