My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
