Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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