if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Randomize
