Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
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