she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize