He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
