addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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