and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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