Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
