who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
