talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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