So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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