I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
