We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
