someone get that fucking seahorse.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
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