How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
