she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
