Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
