Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
