Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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