Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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