Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
we're so committed to being not committed
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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