do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
