Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize