I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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