Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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