im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
