Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Drunk is a universal language darling
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