As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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