that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
