My liver just broke up with me...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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