is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
