I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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