He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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