She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
