apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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