I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
