saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
