We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
