So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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