I am spending my child support on dildos
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
