Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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