well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
