yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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