hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
