He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
