when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
