Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
