Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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